Grandparents Are Precious

 It’s really strange to look through my previous blogs and realize that this is the third one about death… the death of someone close… the death of a grandparent. 

I never thought my world race journey would include losing so many grandparents in such a short time. I never expected that I would return to America with only one grandparent left (I have five because my mom’s dad remarried). It pains me to think that I won’t be able to tell them about my travels, but it also makes me thankful I was able to see them before I left. I am thankful I was able to be and grieve with my family through every loss…that is, except Poppop’s.

Poppop.

Before I launched on the World Race I made a point to spend time with Poppop. Growing up I called him Little Poppop since my mom’s dad was also Poppop. Mom’s dad became Big Poppop and dad’s dad was Little Poppop since… you know… he was the shorter one. 

I knew I needed to make time and cherish the moments with Little Poppop before leaving because I knew they might be the last memories I would have with him. But I just didn’t believe it. Poppop (though he smoked for many years and recently suffered a nasty fall) had always been in relatively good health and seemed totally fine before I left. Deep down I truly believed that I would return from the race and have the chance to tell him about my adventures in person. I even told him that I was looking forward to being back, sitting in his living room, and telling him all the stories I would acquire over the year. 

The past year has been hard. In September of 2017 our family lost Grandma (Little Poppop’s wife, my dad’s mom). Then a few months later in April 2018 our family lost Mommom (my mom’s mom). Next was Big Poppop only 5 months later – a year since we lost Grandma. 

I knew I wouldn’t have my Grandparents forever, but I never expected to lose 3 within a year’s time. When people reached out to offer comfort and condolences to me and my family they would often mention how grandparents are such precious gifts. At the time I brushed this comment off because I think of my grandparents as more than gifts. They are individuals with their own stories, personalities, families, and legacies. They didn’t exist to be a gift to me. But as I’ve had time to reflect I feel I know the powerful emotion and truth behind this sentiment. 

Grandparents are a precious gift because time is a precious gift. 

We are blessed with but are not guaranteed time on this earth. Every single moment is precious which is why it is so important to spend it wisely and steward our time well. No one knows when their life will end, but in our day there’s a general expectation that we will live to be 70 or 80 thanks to modern medicine. Our country is also experiencing a time of relative peace. These factors and more give us an abundance of this precious gift of time… it gives us more moments with our loved ones. 

It’s so amazing that we are able to interact with multiple generations, glean their wisdom, learn from their mistakes, share our lives with them, teach them how to use new technology… ok, that one is hit or miss but you know what I mean. What’s even more amazing is that some people get to interact with their great, great grandparents… what!? Crazy! And PRECIOUS. 

The past few years my family has lived a lot closer to Little Poppop and Grandma so we were able to visit them a lot more. The fact that I had a car during that time made it easier for me to go and visit on my own and I can’t tell how much every one of those one-on-one or two-on-one moments mean to me now. Yeah, I wish I spent more time with them… but more than that I am thankful that I developed and had a friendship with my grandparents. I feel like sometimes our family relationships fail to grow into friendships. Yes, I lost my grandfather, but that’s not why it hurts. It hurts because I also lost my friend. 

This is the ultimate reason why Little Poppop is precious to me. I feel unbelievably lucky to have had a grandfather that I could also call my friend. We both made that happen. A two-way street. He listened to me, spoke into my life, and took interest in me while I listened to things in his life, asked questions out it, and even added my own thoughts sometimes if he wasn’t too fired up lol. We laughed, shared meals, golfed, spoke about books, watched sports, ran errands, and enjoyed life together. 

Every relationship we have is precious. Every moment we have with those we are in a relationship with is precious. It is up to us to decide whether or not we value it as such and if so, what we will then do about it. If someone actually is precious to you, time will literally tell. Are you spending time with them? Are you taking time to tell them how much you value and love them? Are you soaking in every moment or have you forgotten how fleeting and fragile life actually is? 

Please remember, time is precious… spend it well. 

Here’s to you Poppop. My Grandfather. My friend.