Be honest. You’ve been there. We’ve all been there. Whether its all things Star Wars, Tiktok trends, the Bachelor, Chick-fil-A sauce, or that one guy/girl you had a crush on in middle school, we’ve all had obsessions.
Obsessions are funny and they can span a wide spectrum. Don’t worry, I’m not going to ask you to expose your secret obsessions in the comments but, I mean if you want, be my guest!
I’ve had my obsessions over the years, but one is pretty consistent and if I’m not careful it can quickly and thoroughly take over. Are you ready? Here it is…
The Future
Not the juicy reveal you were looking for? My bad lol. I know it’s pretty basic, but let me explain…
Ever since graduating high school I have been obsessed with what comes next. It probably goes back farther than high school honestly. Maybe it comes from desperately wanting to beat the next bad guy on Megaman (a Gameboy SP game I was obsessed with in my youth… if you know, you know). Or perhaps it comes from constantly thinking and praying about God’s ambiguous and grandiose will as a teenager. Either way, I am still obsessed with the future today.
But come on, cut me some slack, it’s hard to not be. In a few months I’ll be off the mission field into a new phase of life. I’m almost 28 years old – that’s how old my dad was when he got married so, I mean, I got some ground to make up if I’m gonna follow in his footsteps lol. For real though, with the life I’m currently living it’s difficult keeping myself from constantly thinking about the next thing.
My friend Paul gave me an encouraging word the other day. He said something like, “Don’t focus so much on preparing that you miss the presence of the Holy Spirit.” That hit home. Mo, another friend of mine (who is quite a few years younger than me I might add) also hit the nail on the head when he reminded me that the time I have right now is so special. I’m currently in the days I will one day look back on as “The Glory Days.” He’s absolutely right.
So what’s the answer? How does one perfectly balance preparing for the future, while also fully enjoying the present?
You don’t.
Well, that’s my opinion at least.
If I’ve learned anything, it’s that perfection isn’t the measure of success, grace is. There is so much grace to get it right or wrong or both in this life. Why do I constantly chase getting it perfect when Jesus already did? Why not trust His perfection by accepting and living in the grace He died to give us? That might be hard for some to hear, and it might be exactly what someone else needs to know.
If there’s a day I overly fixate on what’s to come and I miss out on the current blessings and people around me it’s ok. There is grace. If I get off the mission field and have no clue what I’m doing because I was too caught up in the fun and adventure of the World Race, that’s also ok. Because there is grace and grace in abundance.
This might not be the most ground-breaking blog you’ve ever read. Nor do I want to be that guy who says grace is the remedy for everything (even though it kind of is lol). I do however, want to encourage you to look at life with a different perspective than the rut in which you might currently be stuck.
You can change. You have space to grow, make mistakes, and try again. You can be stuck in an obsession one day, and come back to balance the next. There actually is grace.
So what does this mean for me?
It means I’m ok with being imperfect. I used to think I had to get it just right when praying about a future decision or else God wouldn’t bless it, or I might miss His voice and therefore, His will. I just don’t believe that anymore.
It means I am going to be patient with myself as well as let patience have her complete work because that’s where character is formed.
It means I’m actually going to trust God. Not just “say” I trust Him and then panic until I eventually commit to something, but like, actually letting my trust in God affect my choices on a day to day basis. One day it might look like resting and focusing in on His presence. Another day it might be applying for jobs when I have wifi on the weekends here in Guatemala.
Whatever it looks like, I desire God to be at the center of it all. Because when God is central, planning will actually be productive, and being present will that much sweeter.
So what’s your obsession? And what does it look like to invite God into the very middle of it?
Oh gosh Connor your words are encouragement when I too get stuck obsessing about the future. Thanks for writing this blog and bringing attention and focus back to relationship with the Lord above all else. There is always grace for the process. Miss you friend!
Grace is what it’s all about! Our Jesus has been revealing Himself to you in the sweetest of ways. I’m so glad that you’re being patient with yourself. When you take your hands off and rest in Him, He is “free” to show you His powerful plans for your life. Love you!
love it man! good stuff!!! definitely some good things to reflect on!
SO good! Spoke to where I am right now!
Blessings to you , Connor!! You are right where God has you and can trust Him with His future path for you. Love reading your updates. Looking forward to hearing where our sovereign, loving God leads you next.
Hey, Connor!
I’m Ellie, I Love reading about your encounters with Jesus. I’m actually the host of the “Come and See” Podcast, if you’re up to it, I’d love for you to join on an episode and share how God is moving In Your life. Would you be interested in joining for a thirty minute zoom call?!?